do you reckon we could make snow angels without snow? we could scrape ourselves against the ground, delirium of cold seeping through our pores. then, maybe then, our bodies would scrape away the frost from the pavement without drawing blood. maybe the ice will shatter somewhere inside of us. i’m cold tonight and nothing will warm me.
more than anything, i’d like for the sunset to come around again.
more violent this time, more primitive, innate; heat firing my synapses all at once with broken impulses. and i want it to smell of freshly brewed coffee in a little cafe on a little hidden street nobody knows but stumbles onto by chance. we must always roll the die of life. it’s in the eyes. always in the eyes.
yesterday i would have told you it never comes around, but silence came. and now i know true silence is that which lies in the inevitability of it being broken any moment now. suppose it’s like cutting a cake. don’t ask me why.
and when it comes around you can see it lurking like a shadow in the eyes. a vapid corner of pitch black dark. but we are burning embers in the shadows of the light.
come with me: it will be alright.
i have decided that i will be cold tonight.
but i will try to warm you up.
Posted in chapters of my life
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a night of coveted mirages,
your native tongue between the sheets
parce mots anglais perdent leurs valeur
and my pain rouses as lights flicker out
the echo firing up every synapse in my body
eyes wide open only to see the world forlorn
no deplorable desire in my dejected demur
no looseness in my muted speech
only ashes of the phoenix
you couldn’t believe in
Posted in excerpts
Tagged ashes, believe, body, could, covet, coveted, dejected, demur, deplorable, desire, echo, eyes, fini, fire, firing, flicker, forlorn, lights, loose, looseness, mirage, mute, muted, my, native, night, not, only, open, pain, phoenix, rouse, sheets, speech, synapse, tongue, wide, world, you, your